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Declaration of War

Big Damn Wolves
Attention, Mister Patrick Rothfuss, author of the bestselling debut novel The Name of the Wind [Amazon | Mysterious Galaxy].

I wish you to know that I have read your book and have a great deal of respect for you as an author. After meeting you at the Fantasy Matters conference, not to mention our special time together at ConFusion, I had also come to consider you a friend, sir.

But now your acts have shattered the bounds of civilized behavior. I refer of course to the events of April 22, 2008, when you somehow coopted one T. Hunt into devoting an entire page of his popular web comic to your novel*.

That web comic, as you know, is called Goblins.

First it was the Quill award. Then the New York Times bestseller list. I see you've begun an offensive to claim the Locus award as well. I respect your ambition, and like most authors, was willing to cede you these territories.

But a line must be drawn. Hear me well, Mister Rothfuss. You shall not conquer the goblins. We may be small and weak compared to the doorstopping power of Kvothe and The Name of the Wind, but we are many and we will triumph!


To my friends, fans, and fellow bloggers, I urge you to take up your keyboards and join me in this fight**. Show your support here or in your own blogs. Feel free to repost the above graphic <img src="http://www.sff.net/people/jchines/Temp/Windbreakers.jpg"> or make up your own. Join me in showing Mister Rothfuss that he might take our awards, he might take our bestseller lists, but he will never take our goblins!

And to Patrick himself, I await your response, sir. The blue line has been drawn.*** Cross it if you dare.

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---

*It's actually quite funny. Go check it out.

**On the slim chance anyone doesn't getwhat I'm doing, let me make it clear. I actually like Pat and enjoyed his book a great deal. So anyone who gets truly nasty shall be fed to the goblins. This is all in fun. Now go post a picture of my trilogy beating up Pat's book or something.

***I declare my dodge on you, Pat Rothfuss!

Comments

( 35 comments — Leave a comment )
charlesatan
Apr. 25th, 2008 12:18 pm (UTC)
A big healthy LOL. Especially the Dodge part (alas, Goblins don't Power Attack).
jimhines
Apr. 25th, 2008 12:27 pm (UTC)
I once spent most of a gaming session declaring my dodge on my fellow players, thanks to that comic. Up until they dumped the chips on me and started beating me with the bowl, I mean...
leahbobet
Apr. 25th, 2008 03:16 pm (UTC)
Up until they dumped the chips on me and started beating me with the bowl, I mean...

So clearly the dodge roll didn't turn out too well?

*ducks* :D
jimhines
Apr. 25th, 2008 03:17 pm (UTC)
Well, it is only a +1 bonus, after all :-)
varkat
Apr. 25th, 2008 12:54 pm (UTC)
Too funny!
antonstrout
Apr. 25th, 2008 01:25 pm (UTC)
won't anyone think of the poor, starving psychometrists????

The second Simon seems Kvothe coming down Park Ave, he's taking his retractable bat to him!
jimhines
Apr. 25th, 2008 01:56 pm (UTC)
Please thank Simon for his support!

Simon and Jig gang up on Kvothe. There's an interesting little piece of fanfic for ya...
sartorias
Apr. 25th, 2008 06:41 pm (UTC)
I'd read that!
jimhines
Apr. 25th, 2008 06:55 pm (UTC)
I know DAW officially frowns on fanfiction. But I wonder if Sheila would make an exception in this case.

Or maybe Pat, Anton and I need to do a three-way.

A collaboration, I mean.
kelly_swails
Apr. 25th, 2008 09:50 pm (UTC)
Dude. You had me excited there for a minute. I had my camera ready and everything ...
jimhines
Apr. 25th, 2008 10:48 pm (UTC)
I think this is probably as close as you're gonna get. Sorry!
kelly_swails
Apr. 26th, 2008 12:36 am (UTC)
Hello, new desktop!
hinesbp
Apr. 27th, 2008 04:30 am (UTC)
Oh, my poor innocent eyes.
jimhines
Apr. 27th, 2008 01:36 pm (UTC)
"Innocent," eh? Clearly I need to e-mail my brother and tell him someone has hacked his account and is posting in his name.
chris_gerrib
Apr. 25th, 2008 01:38 pm (UTC)
Thanks for the morning chuckle...
(Anonymous)
Apr. 25th, 2008 02:01 pm (UTC)
Much better than the Kvothe vs. Potter comic from awhile back.

TK
jimhines
Apr. 25th, 2008 02:52 pm (UTC)
This one, I assume? Or have there been multiple KvP strips? Given the popularity of both, I wouldn't be surprised...
steve_buchheit
Apr. 25th, 2008 02:41 pm (UTC)
For some reason I'm having this weird mash-up of Goblins and Braveheart.
jimhines
Apr. 25th, 2008 02:49 pm (UTC)
Good to know that came through :-)

The goblins wouldn't even need to apply the blue woad. Just smear on some white, and they're ready to go!

Hm ... Mel Gibson as a goblin. That would be an interesting movie.
steve_buchheit
Apr. 25th, 2008 10:01 pm (UTC)
I was picturing Jig riding up and down the ranks and getting to the end and having the masses shrug and say, "whatever."

I though Mel was one. Oh, wait, he's a hobgoblin, that's right.
pnkrokhockeymom
Apr. 25th, 2008 02:44 pm (UTC)
You are so badass manly territorial! W00t!
jimhines
Apr. 25th, 2008 02:51 pm (UTC)
::Snort::

You know, there was about a second or so when I was actually annoyed (and probably envious) to see Pat's book get such a big plug in Goblins. I really did have that initial territorial response. Very weird.

Thankfully, it passed quickly, making room for much giggling and amusement.
pnkrokhockeymom
Apr. 25th, 2008 02:59 pm (UTC)
That thing, wherein the initial icky feeling passes? That's called maturity. Wish I could bottle it and send it along to a few people this morning, along with a heady dose of self-awareness.
jimhines
Apr. 25th, 2008 03:23 pm (UTC)
Maturity? You did see the "breaking wind" joke, I assume? :-P
kelly_swails
Apr. 25th, 2008 09:51 pm (UTC)
Pat's an awesome guy. This is going to crack him up. I'm gonna go tell him about it ...
jimhines
Apr. 25th, 2008 10:41 pm (UTC)
I e-mailed him about 2 minutes after posting this :-) I'm hoping he'll play too, but I know he's pretty busy these days.
kelly_swails
Apr. 26th, 2008 12:37 am (UTC)
Oh, he'll play, alright. You will rue the day you crossed the master of Kvothe! ;)
jimhines
Apr. 26th, 2008 02:29 am (UTC)
Heh. Bring it on.
hyptosis
Apr. 26th, 2008 02:13 am (UTC)
Nice picture man. Funny thing here is the only books I've read in the last few months have been yours, and Patrick's, just found that surprising. =]
jimhines
Apr. 26th, 2008 02:28 am (UTC)
That's an entertaining little coincidence. What did you think of Name of the Wind?
hyptosis
Apr. 26th, 2008 03:49 am (UTC)
I love the first quarter of the book, then I havn't really enjoyed the whole university bit, and I've not finished the last few chapters. I'd say ultimatly I like it, I in fact LOVE the begining, but the middle has felt a tad long to me. But I'm sure it is just my taste, some people love that kind of thing. Regardless, it is well written I think, but I'm no writer.

On an unrelated note, I had a comment on one of the jig drawings I did, on Deviantart, a person saying they loved your book, and requesting I draw Slash next. =]
jimhines
Apr. 27th, 2008 12:19 am (UTC)
Ha! I hope you'll let me know if you decide to do a Slash drawing :-)
daydreammuse
Apr. 26th, 2008 04:20 pm (UTC)
Hey you know, this comic is on my list of web comics I always wanted to read, but well I always forget around writing and blogging. I am so starting. Also I am so behind you!! LOL to the cover "break wind" is a fantastic word play! Bow down to your greatness ;)
jimhines
Apr. 27th, 2008 12:16 am (UTC)
Thanks! I enjoyed the comic. It gets a bit bloody sometimes, and the update schedule is on the irregular side, but there's some highly entertaining stuff there. Have fun!
daydreammuse
Apr. 27th, 2008 07:55 am (UTC)
Well I like bloody. Makes it more interesting, but I need the patience to start from the beginning.
( 35 comments — Leave a comment )

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