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20 Neil Gaiman Facts

  1. Neil Gaiman once wrote a Nebula-winning story using only the middle row of his keyboard.
  2. Harper Collins has taken out a 2.5 million dollar insurance policy on Neil Gaiman’s accent.
  3. If you write 1000 words and Neil Gaiman writes 1000 words, Neil Gaiman has written more than you.
  4. Neil Gaiman does not use Microsoft’s grammar-check.  Microsoft uses a Gaiman-check.
  5. Neil Gaiman once did the New York Times crossword puzzle in pen.  In fifteen minutes.  He won two Hugo awards for it.
  6. Neil Gaiman is who the Ghostbusters call.
  7. Most agents charge a 15% commission.  Neil Gaiman’s agent pays him an extra 15% for the privilege of saying “I’m Neil Gaiman’s agent.”
  8. William Shakespeare once came back from the dead to ask for Neil Gaiman’s autograph.
  9. Neil Gaiman is the reason nobody teaches “I before E except after C” anymore.
  10. Some writers take inspiration from the muse.  The muse takes inspiration from Neil Gaiman.
  11. Neil Gaiman once groped Harlan Ellison.
  12. The pen is mightier than the sword; Neil Gaiman has mastered fourteen different styles of penmanship.
  13. Rumor has it that a NY editor rejected Neil Gaiman’s first book.  This can not be confirmed, as the editor in question was never heard from again.
  14. Neil Gaiman can tweet 175 characters.
  15. Neil Gaiman’s personal library includes an autographed copy of the Necronomicon.
  16. Hitler actually won World War II.  Then Neil Gaiman wrote an alternate-history story in which the allies won, and reality was too intimidated to argue the point.
  17. Some authors write in omniscient point of view.  Neil Gaiman lives it.
  18. Neil Gaiman’s next novel is expected to win the Nebula, the Hugo, and the Heisman Trophy.
  19. In any given week, 7 of the top 10 books on the NYT Bestseller List are by pseudonyms of Neil Gaiman.
  20. Neil Gaiman has never written a deus ex machina ending.  However, God once wrote a Gaiman ex machina ending.

Mirrored from Jim C. Hines.

Comments

( 201 comments — Leave a comment )
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scionofgrace
Sep. 8th, 2009 10:49 pm (UTC)
Awesome.
(Anonymous)
Sep. 9th, 2009 05:30 pm (UTC)
Neil Gaiman had Writer's Block once, and the Block won a Hugo.
out_there
Sep. 10th, 2009 11:01 pm (UTC)
That is hilarious! I especially love number eight!
apricot_tree
Sep. 11th, 2009 02:05 am (UTC)
Thank you so much - this brightened my whole day. :D
maxwellgrant
Sep. 11th, 2009 03:52 am (UTC)
As a writer of humor myself (don't bother checking my lj; it's really not there), I truly enjoyed this! I came here via mermaidrain's reposting; I hope to repost this if it's not too late. You just made a fan!
jimhines
Sep. 12th, 2009 12:56 am (UTC)
Thank you! I'm thrilled so many people have been enjoying it.
maxwellgrant
Sep. 12th, 2009 05:09 am (UTC)
I have been enjoying your website as well, I am actually watching CORALINE on dvd, so Gaiman delineations are most appropo about now. TTFN
acciochocolate
Sep. 14th, 2009 02:47 am (UTC)
re: 20 Neil Gaiman Facts
Lovely, just lovely. These should be icons. Or something. :)

The day that Neil actually pens a Doctor Who eppie will be one of the most amazing days of my life.
jimhines
Sep. 14th, 2009 11:56 am (UTC)
Re: 20 Neil Gaiman Facts
Thanks! And may I just say that's the best username I've seen in ages.
lucius_complex
Sep. 14th, 2009 10:49 pm (UTC)
I LOVED THIS! big laughs.
(Anonymous)
Sep. 15th, 2009 10:54 pm (UTC)
XD
LOVED IT! Made me laugh. A lot. A LOT. I met him! He wrote "FINISH THINGS. Love, Neil Gaiman (with his fancy signature :D) Also, we had a little conversation about writing and took a picture with him :DDDD I will ALWAYS smile when I think about Neil Gaiman
umbra_mentis
Sep. 18th, 2009 08:33 am (UTC)
Heh - came across this via a friend; love your list!

Oh, and in Soviet Russia, Neil Gaiman writes grammatically correct English.
ruzsa_moar
Sep. 19th, 2009 09:02 pm (UTC)
This was excellent. Thank you.

I arrived here via drjon.
jimhines
Sep. 19th, 2009 09:25 pm (UTC)
Thank you! I'm thrilled so many people have enjoyed this one :-)
corvidae9
Sep. 27th, 2009 06:03 pm (UTC)
*dies laughing* YESPLZ. You, sir, win. :D
heliocide
Oct. 7th, 2009 10:54 pm (UTC)
#21: When Neil Gaiman wants to avoid intimidating strangers, he just tells them he's Chuck Norris.
jimhines
Oct. 7th, 2009 10:57 pm (UTC)
Ha! Very nice.
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( 201 comments — Leave a comment )

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