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First of all, thank you to everyone who shared your thoughts and experiences on yesterday's post about rape. If you haven't already, I'd encourage people to go back and read through some of the comments.

I do find it ironic that I posted my piece about rape and objectification on the same day others were posting about how great it was to have a big group of people at Penguicon all asking to feel women's breasts.

I did come away from Penguicon with an Origami Goblin, though. That was quite nifty*. (Thanks, origamilady!) I missed some of the things I had hoped to see, and I didn't catch up with everyone, but I did see and meet some wonderful people, and had a great time. Got home around 1 in the morning, and spent the next day perfecting my disguise as a useless lump.

It's frustrating how tired I get after these things. My wife told me a long time ago that the difference between an extrovert and an introvert isn't so much that the former can be outgoing and the latter can't, but the former tends to draw energy from these interactions, whereas the introvert ends up drained. Me, I'm definitely in the introvert category. I can be "on" and outgoing and friendly, but then I come home and sit there alone on the couch watching Firefly until I've recovered enough to see people again.

I think I've got my brain back now, though. And my blood sugar is pretty much under control again. (It was very good pizza!) So it's back to the grind, and time to interrogate a mermaid.


ETA: There's also the origami fire-spider, courtesy of andrewkaye. That one didn't turn out quite so well...


( 53 comments — Leave a comment )
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Apr. 22nd, 2008 05:43 pm (UTC)
Your wife is absolutely right. I can enjoy a convention, have a great time seeing old friends and meeting new ones, be "on" as required, but they always leave me wrung out.
Apr. 22nd, 2008 05:58 pm (UTC)
Yep. It's a great experience, but don't make me do too much all at once. Last year I had two conventions in a row, one week after another. I was not a pretty sight by the end of that.
Apr. 22nd, 2008 05:50 pm (UTC)
*raises hand* Another introvert here! My husband and I used to vend at conventions and always missed out on the evening parties and stuff because by the end of the day being "on" in the dealers room, all we wanted to do was crash and hide out alone and recover.
Apr. 22nd, 2008 05:54 pm (UTC)
You know, now that I think about it, one of the things that probably wiped me out this weekend was that -- since I was only there for Saturday -- I didn't have a hotel room to retreat to. Even ducking out for 10 minutes of quiet can help a lot.

And I rarely make the evening parties either.
Apr. 22nd, 2008 05:52 pm (UTC)
Yet another introvert checking in, which is why I seldom go to cons. Well, that and money.

I've been pimping bellwether_talk in response to the "boob" project.
Apr. 22nd, 2008 05:56 pm (UTC)
Between hotels and mileage, there's only so much conventioning I can afford either. It's nice when they reimburse registration for panelists, but that's really the least of the expenses.

You know, I think one of the best comments I've seen is that, "Aha! Clearly Connie Willis wasn't wearing her red button!"
(no subject) - sistercoyote - Apr. 22nd, 2008 05:59 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - steve_buchheit - Apr. 23rd, 2008 04:37 pm (UTC) - Expand
Apr. 22nd, 2008 05:53 pm (UTC)
Hi! First, it was great to meet you. (I'm Kimberly, and we chatted some about how my 13 year old would love your books, and a bit in the green room with Bear and Tammy Pierce?).

Second, I'm the same way. I am still a bit run down. I can be a shiny bauble, but not for very long, and then I just want books or DVDs or sleep until I feel like I could handle sociability again.
Apr. 22nd, 2008 05:58 pm (UTC)
Hi Kimberly! I wondered if you were on LJ. Can't imagine how I didn't make the connection to pnkrokhockeymom :-) It was fun getting to meet and chat with you, too!

So what kind of spider am I looking at here, anyway?
(no subject) - pnkrokhockeymom - Apr. 22nd, 2008 06:06 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - jimhines - Apr. 22nd, 2008 08:41 pm (UTC) - Expand
Apr. 22nd, 2008 06:02 pm (UTC)
That's cool. How many people can say they own an origami goblin? It's definitely a conversation starter. Great for introverts.
Apr. 22nd, 2008 06:16 pm (UTC)
Next I may have to bug her for an origami fire spider :-)
(no subject) - andrewkaye - Apr. 22nd, 2008 06:25 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - jimhines - Apr. 22nd, 2008 06:28 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - andrewkaye - Apr. 22nd, 2008 06:34 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - jimhines - Apr. 22nd, 2008 06:50 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - andrewkaye - Apr. 22nd, 2008 07:01 pm (UTC) - Expand
Apr. 22nd, 2008 06:02 pm (UTC)
Your post yesterday was beautifully written. Thank you.

And I know what you mean - I spent the weekend at a 4-H horse bowl and hippoloy contest with my daughter. It was wonderful fun, but oh my goodness - I'm still recovering. I can only take so much company before I need my peace and quiet!
Apr. 22nd, 2008 06:17 pm (UTC)
Whereas the kids seem to go nonstop, crash and sleep, then bounce up ready for more. Darn kids wouldn't even let me sleep in on Sunday :-P
Apr. 22nd, 2008 06:11 pm (UTC)
I crash at about two days into a con. I'm planning to mediate this in the future by skipping segments of the cons and getting away from the horde. Perhaps watching Firefly on my laptop....
Apr. 22nd, 2008 06:15 pm (UTC)
"Firefly: your cure for convention burnout. Buy the DVDs today from a dealer near you!"
Apr. 22nd, 2008 06:18 pm (UTC)
Yesterday's post: finally put my own $.02 in on the issue, something I hadn't seen someone else mention.

I just saw the "Open Source Boobs" thing on Scalzi's feed. Uh huh. Which ties in to...
Introvert vs. Extroverts.
I'd say just about every writer I know is an introvert, I write ( so far unpublished ) but the really serious writers I know are introverts. I wonder if that introversion is a function of being a writer. That the need to communicate is put through the filter of the printed word?
I have a friend of friend who is starting to make more con appearances, and they exhaust him. Heck, dealing with the people at his day job exhausts him. He uses the weekend to hibernate away from people so he can be ready to deal with them Monday morning, and as far as I know, he doesn't deal with the public.

OTOH, back in my live combat LARP days, I once got the entire group ( some 60 people ) whipped up into a frenzy and lead a revolution, and was bouncing around for weeks afterwards.

I've noticed though, that most of the 'touchey' people I know are introverts. I've also noticed that in some ways extroverts are more private than the introverts I know. It was Neitzsche who said "Talking about oneself can also be a means to conceal oneself." I think that's what extroverts do - by controlling the conversation, it can be kept to "safe" areas.
Going back to hugging ( which Scalzi mentions, ask first ), I'm not really comfortable getting touched by someone unless I know them really well. I'll talk to random strangers in a line about weather, local and national politics, and the price of things, but getting brushed up against sets my teeth on edge.

Edited at 2008-04-22 06:23 pm (UTC)
Apr. 22nd, 2008 06:20 pm (UTC)
Last con I was at, I retreated to my room by 8pm...and watched "While You were Sleeping". It really helped.

I'm learning. A hotel room is really helpful, also.
Apr. 22nd, 2008 08:38 pm (UTC)
Yup. Any safe place where you can retreat and hide, even for 10 minutes or so...
Apr. 22nd, 2008 06:46 pm (UTC)
There is a great book called The Introvert Advantage by Marti Olsen Laney. It talks about a lot of these issues and how to deal with them. I recommend that one to everyone. An extroverted friend of mine didn't really understand her introverted daughter (only child) until she read that book. Now she understands why her daughter needs 15 minutes alone in her room after school.

My parents are both "innies." When they go to parties they always tell the host that they have to leave early. They have a wonderful time, leave at 10:00, go home and get into bed and read for an hour to recover. I love how they know themselves and know what they need, and how they are in it together.

Margaret Yang
Apr. 22nd, 2008 06:53 pm (UTC)
Not to schew the point of your post, but did you see this?

Apr. 22nd, 2008 07:04 pm (UTC)
I had not. I've read some of the posts on this, but ... ugh.

You know, I had been thinking about how much fun it could be to take my daughter to one of these things someday...
(no subject) - michaeldthomas - Apr. 22nd, 2008 07:16 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - sistercoyote - Apr. 22nd, 2008 07:24 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - mela_lyn - Apr. 22nd, 2008 07:28 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - jimhines - Apr. 22nd, 2008 07:30 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - brownkitty - Apr. 22nd, 2008 07:50 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - mela_lyn - Apr. 22nd, 2008 07:52 pm (UTC) - Expand
Apr. 22nd, 2008 07:16 pm (UTC)
My wife told me a long time ago that the difference between an extrovert and an introvert isn't so much that the former can be outgoing and the latter can't, but the former tends to draw energy from these interactions, whereas the introvert ends up drained.

Yep; that's the classic Meyers/Briggs definition of introversion and extroversion.
Apr. 22nd, 2008 07:32 pm (UTC)
That has remained one of the most liberating things I've ever read for years now. I can explain myself.
(no subject) - jimhines - Apr. 22nd, 2008 08:23 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - tsubaki_ny - Apr. 22nd, 2008 09:27 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - dr_phil_physics - Apr. 23rd, 2008 02:18 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - jimhines - Apr. 23rd, 2008 11:31 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - tsubaki_ny - Apr. 23rd, 2008 02:41 pm (UTC) - Expand
Apr. 22nd, 2008 09:27 pm (UTC)
Your post yesterday was great, though I had nothing in particular to add to it. Now, the con thing...

I found out for real that I was an introvert at my first American Library Association conference (20K+ people). Just so tired at the end of each day, and going to my room really was more enjoyable than going out dancing would have been.
Apr. 22nd, 2008 09:47 pm (UTC)
Huh! That explains why I get all wound up at cons, and have a ball, but need the day after to recover.
Apr. 22nd, 2008 11:46 pm (UTC)
Goblins! Firefly!
Hey, a bit off-topic, but Goblin related. As you may or may not know, recently I moved. Due to my YeomanRandInAChampagneGlass t-shirt I discovered my new neighbors were Trekkies. Today, I was out on the patio building furniture when I noticed that Kathy, a librarian at a local public library, was reading Goblin Hero. Hey, I said, did you read Goblin Quest. No, she replied, I just discovered these books and the library couldn't get it in fast enough. Want to borrow mine, I asked. Yes, she exclaimed!

Seems the Goblin trilogy is gaining steam in the library world and requests for the book are picking up. As her library is the only local one with all three volumes IN, it isn't, if you get my drift. She says no one knew about the books until volume three was reviewed by Publishers Weekly (she thinks that's the one -- it was a big publisher at any rate.) So, she might friend you ... she is LJ Kathy_the_Geek and she can probably give you good tips on getting your books out to a wider audience.

Also, when she heard it was a trilogy she wailed ... say it isn't so!!!!

As for Firefly ... oh yeah, might be the only series where I can watch an episode over and over and over, like my favorite track on an album.

Apr. 23rd, 2008 03:38 pm (UTC)
Re: Goblins! Firefly!
Hi Sue,

Thanks for sharing that! I was incredibly happy to see Goblin War get noticed in PW, and I hoped this would be one of the results. I don't know how decisions get made over there or why the first two books didn't get a review but this one did ... but it certainly seems to have helped.

And I'll keep an eye out for Kathy_the_Geek. Sounds like you've got some good new neighbors :-)

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Jim C. Hines


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