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Pose-off with John Scalzi

ETA: While the overall response to the fundraiser and pics continues to be exponentially awesome, I’ve also seen a few areas where response has begun to shift from, “I say, those poses seem remarkably impractical, and how exactly does one do that without dislocating one’s ankle?” to “Hey, guys dressing or posing like girls are both ugly and hilarious!” Which misses the point so badly it’s not even funny. Please see this follow-up post for my thoughts on the context of these poses, the hotness of John Scalzi, and my apology for not better framing and presenting this post in the first place.


When I started the Aicardi Syndrome Fundraiser, I recruited bestselling author and ukulele prodigy John Scalzi to be a bonus goal when we hit the $1000 mark.

We raised that much on the first day. Which meant it was time to see once and for all (at least until the next round) who was the true cover-posing master!

I issued the challenge, offering him the choice of three book covers to imitate. With the help of his readers, he selected The Taste of Night [Amazon | B&N | Mysterious Galaxy], by Vicki Pettersson.

This was the big one. After warming up, I took a break to walk off the pains of the previous poses, and to mentally prepare myself. I meditated for three days and six nights. I purified my body with a diet of crushed ice, unbuttered toast, and green Skittles. I studied one of our cat to learn the true secret of flexibility. Unfortunately, all I learned was the secret of well-timed cat farts.

But my training period was over. I put the Rocky soundtrack on the stereo, changed clothes, and began Operation Sexy Leg.

My wife took eight photos, helping me to adjust my stance each time, then giving me a chance to fall down between takes. But I think it was worth it!

Dear Internet: I present to you my version of The Taste of Night!

I’d like to thank my daughter for letting me borrow her bracelet, and my wife for the shoes and for letting me sacrifice one of her disposable razors.

But John Scalzi wanted to win this thing as much as I did. I don’t know what master he trained with, but whoever that wise and sadistic sensei might be, they turned Mister Scalzi into a posing opponent to be feared. John went all out in his own, special way.

Over on Twitter, John offered his thoughts on the process, saying, “AAAARRRGH MY HIP!”

I’d like to thank everyone for their donations and generosity so far, and John in particular for his willingness to play along. Please remember that the fundraiser runs through the end of the month, and the money raised supports both research into Aicardi Syndrome and the biannual conference which helps to unite these families, connecting them to a much-needed network of support.

And remember, there are more goals to come, including the $5000 group pose with me, Scalzi, Stross, Rothfuss, and Kowal! You know you want to see this, and we’re getting so close!

Go. Donate. Make the world better, and force more authors to injure themselves in humorous ways for a great cause.

But first, it’s time to make your voice heard! (I’m crossing my fingers that the poll widget works!)



Mirrored from Jim C. Hines.


( 77 comments — Leave a comment )
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Dec. 11th, 2012 02:37 pm (UTC)

Dec. 11th, 2012 03:36 pm (UTC)
I am in awe! I won't even shave my legs for my own skirt-wearing self.
(no subject) - cissa - Dec. 14th, 2012 09:42 pm (UTC) - Expand
Dec. 11th, 2012 02:39 pm (UTC)
Love it! :D
Rea Manderino
Dec. 12th, 2012 05:02 pm (UTC)
I'm responding to you solely because I love your avatar. I based my first tattoo from this scene. Did you make the gif yourself or find it somewhere?
(no subject) - liz_dejesus - Dec. 12th, 2012 06:31 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - Rea Manderino - Dec. 13th, 2012 10:50 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - liz_dejesus - Dec. 13th, 2012 10:53 pm (UTC) - Expand
Dec. 11th, 2012 02:43 pm (UTC)
My eyes! My eyes!
Dec. 11th, 2012 02:45 pm (UTC)
Please say that you're going to turn these shots into a calendar. Please.
Dec. 11th, 2012 07:49 pm (UTC)
Yes. CALENDARS FOR CHARITY! I would so buy that.
(no subject) - thingswithwings - Dec. 11th, 2012 09:04 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - northernwalker - Dec. 12th, 2012 04:00 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - snapes_angel - Dec. 12th, 2012 07:29 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - gardenwaltz - Dec. 12th, 2012 09:05 pm (UTC) - Expand
Dec. 11th, 2012 02:45 pm (UTC)
*will never, ever ever be able to recover from seeing Scalzi in that outfit/pose....*

BTW, Jim, you've got damn fine legs. :-)
Dec. 11th, 2012 03:03 pm (UTC)
Even if I didn't wax? ;-)
(no subject) - suricattus - Dec. 11th, 2012 03:16 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - scarlettina - Dec. 11th, 2012 03:29 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - Scott Jowett - Dec. 11th, 2012 05:37 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - starcat_jewel - Dec. 11th, 2012 07:51 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - rowyn - Dec. 11th, 2012 04:02 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - tylik - Dec. 11th, 2012 04:13 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - rowyn - Dec. 11th, 2012 04:44 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - tylik - Dec. 11th, 2012 05:34 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - rowyn - Dec. 11th, 2012 05:42 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - tylik - Dec. 11th, 2012 06:02 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - pickledginger - Dec. 11th, 2012 06:13 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - tylik - Dec. 11th, 2012 08:59 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - pickledginger - Dec. 11th, 2012 10:56 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - tylik - Dec. 11th, 2012 11:10 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - pickledginger - Dec. 11th, 2012 11:21 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - rantinan - Dec. 11th, 2012 09:04 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - tylik - Dec. 11th, 2012 09:20 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - rantinan - Dec. 11th, 2012 11:54 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - tylik - Dec. 12th, 2012 12:03 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - mtlawson - Dec. 11th, 2012 07:21 pm (UTC) - Expand
Dec. 11th, 2012 02:50 pm (UTC)
I'm such a fan of your wife!
Dec. 11th, 2012 03:03 pm (UTC)
Me too!!!
(no subject) - snapes_angel - Dec. 12th, 2012 07:31 pm (UTC) - Expand
(Deleted comment)
Dec. 11th, 2012 03:10 pm (UTC)
And as I read this, my media player plays Bob Rivers' "Walkin' Round in Women's Underwear."

Seriously, though, it's things like this, the charity bit and creativity, that makes me proud to be a geek.
Dec. 11th, 2012 03:29 pm (UTC)
You're closer to the pose. You got her hip-thrust and torso twist while Scalzi is only in a squat.
Dec. 11th, 2012 03:30 pm (UTC)
I didn't get a chance to thank you for doing Summoning. It needed to be done. But the Taste of Night cover is a whole other thing. :-) Well done, sir. Well done! (And such a leg!)
Dec. 11th, 2012 03:39 pm (UTC)
Competition brings out the best in me. Or the worst :-)
(Deleted comment)
Dec. 11th, 2012 03:39 pm (UTC)
Oh good - glad you found them both.

Whether or not you're glad to have seen them, well, that's an entirely different question :-)
Dec. 11th, 2012 03:40 pm (UTC)
It was a tough call because you both brought a little something. Scalzi got points for the wig. But you have the better form and SHAVED. talk about dedication for the pose. XD

If I wasn't at work now, I'd be getting myself a drink. I still might.
Dec. 11th, 2012 03:47 pm (UTC)
Oh the horror! But yes, you SHAVED for us, even the one leg. THAT brings the win, outweighs the wig. Also, your right leg is in the position and his isn't. But both of you lose just a few points for not getting that sexy head tilt, though yours is almost there. These are scary, Jane Hines, truly scary. I will make a donation! :D

Dec. 11th, 2012 04:51 pm (UTC)
Awesome. jimhines you really got the facial expression down! :D
Dec. 11th, 2012 05:08 pm (UTC)
You *shaved* - you *committed*! (Sorry Scalzi, I think you're awesome, but Jim has to suffer through itchy regrowth.)
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( 77 comments — Leave a comment )


Jim C. Hines


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